Atlas Profilax adjustment: when I allow a man to drill my neck

the Atlas bone

the Atlas bone

And there was me thinking that an atlas was a collection of maps.

In my defense, I have never visited a chiropractor nor an osteopath so I wouldn’t have even considered it might be a bone.

But now, thinking about it, it makes sense.  The deity Atlas, in classical mythology, managed to support the earth and heavens on his buff shoulders.  And so the atlas bone – at the top of our spine – supports our heads and all the pretty thoughts that go in it.  Its name is not in vain.

Matthew Voigts with his Atlas bone

Matthew Voigts with his Atlas bone

A contact of mine is working with the Atlas Clinic to spread the word of Matthew Voigtsand his belief in the atlas treatment.  BIG claims are made about the realignment of this naughty bone, which he claims is incorrectly positioned in more than 90% of us, mere mortals.  I agreed to go along and, at least, chat to him about his work.

For any appointment on Harley Street (the Atlas Clinic is in London Medical Centre, 142-146 Harley St, W1), I am always keen to get there early.  I’m a little potty about the waiting rooms, you see.  A large selection of all those plush magazines you’d never buy:  Country Life, Good Housekeeping, Homes and Gardens… and an invitation to sit in this quiet, lavish yet lived in drawing room is just too exciting to miss out on.

spirit level measuring of my hips

spirit level measuring of my hips

Once upstairs with Matthew, he explains that he is one of only a handful of medical specialists around the world who believe the atlas bone is key to a vast range of cures.  I explain that I do get headaches (tension headaches) when overly busy.  And, while I am curious to know if how far my Atlas bone is ‘out’, I don’t fancy the side effects he is warning me about.  I might feel really tired with a headache that evening.  But, readers, you’ll remember I had a big night planned with the girls last Friday.  They would have been FURIOUS if I’d sacrificed this for a little bone moving.

misaligned me

misaligned me

First Matthew spirit leveled my hips (clearly not the medical term).  And then he asked me to lie on my front on the bed with my feet up in the air.  Just look at the pictures to see how misaligned my body is because of my over-swiveled bone: one of my legs is even longer than the other!

wonky length legs

wonky length legs

Glancing at the hand-held device (patented by the Swiss), I felt uneasy.  But I also felt curious – curious enough to allow him to try and reinstate my atlas bone.

The device is more like a massage gadget on steroids.  And the treatment is non-invasive and non-manipulative but he does need to apply some pressure on a neck as tense and knotted as mine.

The best bit is that the treatment is immediate.  Before I knew it my atlas bone was realigned and my legs, hips and the rest of my body were perfectly level.

level again at the Atlas Clinic

level again at the Atlas Clinic

I have waited 7 days to write this up just to see how felt. Initially I felt euphoric (apparently a common side-effect) and I had no headache afterwards nor felt the least bit tired as I sipped cocktails and danced that night.  I have increased mobility in my neck and certainly haven’t had a sniff of a headache… yet.

I have told my atlas story over Saturday night dinner with friends and at the school gates to a pretty much Marmite response.  Some are desperate for the clinic’s details to cure their insomnia, chronic fatigue, neck, back and headaches while there were also sniggers of doubt and then full on fury from Him who even called me irresponsible for ‘allowing a man to drill my neck’.

Matthew Voigt and his Atlas Clinic offer the Atlas Profilax adjustment for £225.  A further check-up appointment to assess the position of the atlas bone is essential and included in this price. 020 7160 0073

 

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